Divorced Before 30

It was October 2006, and I was navigating the murky waters of match.com. Creating my profile was traumatic enough, and then the crazy guys started to “wink” at me. Could I stomach an actual date? And who, exactly, was seeking a 29-year-old divorced woman who lived in her parents’ basement? Some guys will overlook such factors if your picture is reasonably cute, and after a couple weeks of winks and e-mails, I felt brave enough to date.

The first guy, Mr. Suit, was an attorney in his mid-30s. He sported a suit and tie in his profile picture, but I figured it was just a head shot for his firm’s website. We met for an after-dinner coffee, and I knew in an instant that this was far from a match. He was old beyond his years and far too well behaved for the likes of me. I’d be willing to bet that he irons his t-shirts. Our conversation was way too much work, and I politely excused myself post-latte.

The second guy, The Biker, was a single dad who had lived in Europe for several years and was really into cycling. He was in pharmaceutical sales, so he showed up in a tie for our coffee date, but he was much more relaxed than Mr. Suit, and we had a fun conversation. However, I must admit that it was disorienting to talk to a guy my age who was so grounded and responsible. Not disorienting bad, though, and I decided there was potential there.

The third guy, The Geek, was a self-proclaimed geek with a great sense of humor. We talked on the phone a few times, and it turned out that we had some mutual friends. He was in his early 30s, had started his own business, and really seemed to have his act together. Since I could do a little character reference on him (I did!), I agreed to meet him for dinner the following weekend.

In the mean time, it was Halloween, and my girlfriends decided that we needed to do it up right. And that’s how I got talked into traipsing around downtown Minneapolis in a short skirt and cowboy boots. We were a fearless pack of rather inauthentic cowgirls—the kind who wear too much lipstick and haven’t ridden a horse since the early 90s.

We hit up a few parties, and against my better judgment, I gave my phone number to a rather persistent guy with a big gold earring and an eye patch. Let’s call him The Pirate. When he called a few days later, I learned that he a good deal older than me, and I took the easy way out by playing the recently-divorced-not-ready card. Weak, I know!

At the end of the month, I reflected on my new adventures in post-divorce dating, and I still had trouble believing that I could do whatever I wanted. The nightmares of being trapped in the house with John persisted, but in real life, I was free. I was seriously considering getting a tattoo of my maiden name—or at least an “S,” like my brothers have—as if to brand myself as my very own.

*****

Blog Housekeeping:

If you haven’t become a fan of Divorced Before 30 on Facebook, please do!

Thanks so much to fellow Twin Cities blogger Elle, of “A” For Effort (“B” for Blog), who gave me a Beautiful Blogger Award. Check out her blog!

The rules for this award are that I have to tell you seven interesting things about myself and pass it along to seven other bloggers. I’m going to pass this award on to the fine women behind these blogs:

Blissed-Out Grandma
Irretrievably Broken
Since My Divorce
The Suburban Zoo
Random Thoughts of a Lutheran Geek
The Trephine
…you and me and baby makes three…

And now for the seven (mildly) interesting things about myself.

1. I have a master’s degree in Exercise and Sport Studies, but I don’t play any ball sports. In fact, I am actually afraid getting hit by a ball.
2. I hate elevators and thus climb eight flights of stairs in my office building twice a day. I don’t mind the exercise one bit!
3. I have read all 1,000+ pages of Gone With the Wind twice, and I just might read it again someday.
4. I can quote many stupid movies from the ’90s, such as Billy Madison. This is what happens when you have three younger brothers.
5. I’ve run five marathons, but I consider myself semi-retired from the 26.2. I may toe the line again for my 40th birthday.
6. I have a thing for striped socks.
7. I didn’t end up getting my “S” tattoo. I don’t have any ink. I’d be surprised if I ever will, but who knows?